Disclaimer: I blurred out a few detailed things just to smoothened the harsh truth.
So there's this a man, one of my lecturer. He teaches 'Some-Super-Specific-Subject'. I kinda like the way he explains everything to the class. He puts some humour, motivations, and satires beautifully.
Yesterday, he taught us about climate change impacts to any sectoral element possible. Aaaaand, he then asked,
👱🏼"Ada yg dari 'Somewhere'?"
Of course the class shouted my name (sebenernya ada aku sama 'SomeoneElse', temenku orang Somewhere-also, tapi dia agak pendiem gitudeh so yeah.....) and so I raised my hand.
He tried to impersonate our accent (which for me is waaay too much but idk if the class found it's funny), and asked me,
👱🏼"Dari Kabupaten apa?"
😱"Somewhere-too Pak"
👱🏼"Oh, Ayahnya kerja apa? Petani garam?"
😱"Bukan Pak"
👱🏼"PNS?"
😱"Bukan"
👱🏼"Oh, kerja apa?"
😱"Hmm.. Servis komputer"
👱🏼"Wah keren banget, servis komputernya pake garam ya? (He did this with an exaggerated gesture of excitement which made me uncomfortable)"
And the class laughed. I felt like I'm forced to, too.
👱🏼"Nggak, kan yg terkenal dari Somewhere itu garamnya."
And that bothers me the whole day. When the lecture is over and it's break time, I did Ashar, and somehow cried. I don't know if I'm way too sensitive or it doesn't make sense to you but I feel really really sad that one of the coolest person in my life is being mocked by one person (that doesn't even know how you were) just because of your origin. Ive been experiencing this kind of 'mild discrimination' since my 1st year and I still don't get it. What is so wrong about Somewhere? Why do everyone look at us the way they did?
And more specifically when it comes to your case, I truly feel triggered and hence I cried again when it's near bed time. You're the one that shaped my perception of the world, the one that ignites my curiosity and my interest on many things like humanity and philosophy and other huge questions to think about. You're the one that introduced me to two whole different worlds, the internet and the international world, the one that encourage me to look up to the bigger picture, not only about Indonesia but to be brave to see what's going on in the other hemisphere.
And I can't get over it until now.
I imagine how hard it is to be you back then. I know it's not your choice to be born in what kind of family, but you chose to be what you are now. You fought for my education, you somehow managed to give me books (I don't know where did they came from and I'll pretend im not interested in knowing that) and grows the habit of reading to me. You gave me English dictionary on my 8th birthday and I remember how happy I was receiving my first ever birthday present. And I love English, until now.
You dare to be out of your comfort zone for me and that's literally everything.
I want to thank you for everything.
You're the most awesome father a daughter could have and thank you for that.
I love you to the moon and back.
Aku sayang Bapak.
0 Comments